Farewell from (and to) China

This is our last night in China. At least as a resident.

Many people have asked me whether I have any regrets about living in China this past year. I honestly don't have any regrets, although there have been days when I thought that I needed to have my brain checked. And I'm sure you thought so too at one point or another. But I am open to doing another expat assignment for my company in the future, and I highly recommend it to anyone who has the opportunity to do so. The things that you discover (about yourself as well as the world) by stepping outside of your comfort zone is worth the risks of doing so.

I look forward to seeing everyone soon!!

Early Birthday Celebration

Sydney's birthday isn't until Friday, the 30th, but since we are leaving for the airport at 1pm on Friday, we were not going to have time to celebrate it with her class then. So we had the party today and there is nothing like 12 toddlers waiting for birthday cake to make you wish you were a toddler too. We have attended several birthday parties in the last month so Sydney is very familiar with birthdays so I didn't have to explain much about her big birthday. If she hears the word birthday, her next 2 sentences will include the words "Sydney/I/Me," "cake," and "presents." And when she remembers her manners, you will also hear the word "please," which quickly turns into "p-u-l-e-e-e-e-z-e" when she doesn't get cake and/or presents.

Her face lit up when I arrived at the school in the morning and told her it was her birthday and yes, there would be cake. The kids had to patiently wait on the sitting rug to wash their hands before they were able to sit at the table to have cake. I am amazed how the teachers were able to wrangle 12 kids into their chairs and they were insistent that there would be no festivities until every child was in their proper place. The kids were just mezmerized by the cake --- I have never heard the classroom so quiet.

(Pooh bear and his friends cake)

The class sang Happy Birthday to Sydney in English and Chinese. Then Miss Amy lit 2 candles for Sydney and immediately half of the class jumped up to blow them out. Miss Kang explained to the kids (in English and Chinese) that only Sydney can blow out the candles because it was Sydney's birthday party. We waited until all of the kids acknowledged that they understood the rules before lighting the candles again. And yes, again, half of the kids jumped up to blow out the candles. It took a couple of tries but Sydney finally was able to blow out her own candles.

Our Last Weekend

This is our last weekend in Shanghai, and Sydney's first weekend without her toys. The weekend started off great --- Sydney spent Friday afternoon playing with her classmates on the school playground. The kids are always more rambunctious on Friday afternoons than any other days and the other Moms and I always joke that somehow they understand that the school week is over. The pictures on this post are from the playground last Friday. Sydney has not been sleeping well since our things were picked up to be shipped to Dallas. She's fine and happy during the day but she has had nightmares a couple of nights, one of which she woke up screaming for her blanket (which was right next to her), and she's been getting up in a cranky mood. It will be another 5 days until she is reunited with her things, and hopefully she will be back to her normal self --- that is, after she gets over jet lag, gets settled in the house, and gets adjusted to her new daycare. I was going to have our ayi babysit for me on Saturday so that I can get my last $20 massage in Shanghai. But she has been so weepy and sentimental about Sydney leaving this week, that I've been nervous to leave them alone together. Our ayi asked me last week to take her and her husband with me to Dallas. I was so surprised that she asked, and she was very disappointed when I said no. Even if I wanted to bring her, it is not as easy as just buying her plane tickets and it would not be something that I could make happen in a week. I had to send her home early because I just felt uncomfortable with her being so disappointed, and she practically ran out of the house. Actually, I have had sent her home early several times last week because she keeps following Sydney and I around the house, watching us play -- like a stalker. She even stands at the bathroom door to watch Sydney go potty. She'll stroke Sydney's hair and look so longingly at Sydney while I'm holding Sydney or playing with her. I know that she loves Sydney and I appreciate that she has taken such good care of Sydney, but as I've said before, I think she is too attached to Sydney and it makes me nervous. I'm not leaving her alone with Sydney until we leave. And I'm dreading their last good bye on Thursday.

We started our Saturday morning with pancakes and after spending 4 hours playing with 3 toys and reading 5 books over and over again, both Sydney and I were really restless. It rained on and off all weekend, plus there is still an outbreak of hand, foot and mouth disease, so I kept Sydney inside all weekend. Luckily, our friend Sebastien invited us to lunch at a great Taiwanese restaurant so we had something to do for a couple of hours. But after Sydney's nap, she was climbing the walls. There was a point when she was literally trying to scale the wall in the dining room. I had bought a couple of Mickey Mouse DVDs in case things got desperate this weekend, and we reached that point at 3:21pm on Saturday.

I'll spare you the trials and tribulations of Sunday. Let's just say that I got my money's worth from the DVDs and that I was counting down the minutes until I can drop her off at school this morning.

Deja Vu

These pictures are all too familiar. It seems like yesterday that my home was cluttered with boxes and piles of clothes. But it has been a year, and we are moving again. The relocation company came over today and packed up all of our things and whisked them away. As usual, I'm surprised at how much stuff we have. We haven't shopped much in Shanghai --- between concerns about quality issues and significant markups, we've only shopped when we were traveling outside of Shanghai. I am giving most of our tableware, pots, pans, bedding and food to our ayi or friends, and we still ended up with 24 boxes. We should receive our shipment a week after we arrive in Dallas. There is no turning back now.

I was really nervous that Sydney would come home from school today and be upset that almost all of her toys and books are missing. We stayed at school for a while after class so that she could play with her friends on the school's playground. There is an outbreak of hand, foot and mouth disease in China, including Shanghai. The school has done an amazing job of sanitizing the entire campus several times a day and implementing procedures to prevent an outbreak at the school. In addition to frequent hand washings, I've been keeping Sydney out of the playground at our apartment complex because it is not cleaned as often as the one at school. So after a weekend of being couped up in the apartment because of the rain and a paranoid Mom, Sydney was happy to spend time at the playground today.

When we arrived home, she didn't even notice that most of her things were missing. I kept a couple of her favorite books and a couple of toys that drive me crazy (which I'm planning to throw away when we leave next week --- coincidentally, they are most of the toys bought by our ayi), and she was happy to play with them. I don't know how long those couple of things will keep her occupied so I have a couple of Mickey Mouse DVDs as backup.

Farewell Tour

My friend from Dallas, Michelle, was in town last week for a visit and I used that opportunity to visit all of my favorite restaurants. Since Michelle was in Shanghai only during the week, I had to work and wasn't able to spend as much time with her as I would have liked. But Michelle didn't have any problems getting around and was able to see much of Shanghai.

Sydney and I have been doing the farewell tour through Shanghai. We've visited our favorite restaurants, play areas and shops. We finally got around to doing some souvenir shopping -- things that will help us remember our year in China, although I don't think that I will ever forget this experience. It is nice to have this blog to remind me if I do forget. I don't feel sentimental about leaving Shanghai --- at least not yet. Part of the reason why is because all of my friends here, except for one, are moving back to their home countries either this summer or in December. And part of it is that I'm looking forward to being home -- where friends and family are, where Chipotle and Bangkok City are, where my first house is and where Sydney and I became a family. Dallas is Home and, and as they say, there is no place like Home. Ironically, I've spent years complaining about how dull my life in Dallas was and now I'm so sentimental about it. This is one of reasons why I love to travel --- it helps me appreciate what I have.

I had put my house on the market in February and decided to take it off the market last week. I have too much going on with moving back to Dallas, getting Sydney settled into a new environment and new school, and adapting to a new schedule to worry about moving into a new house too. I am very excited to move back into a familiar place and be around familiar faces.

The photos on this blog are from a photo shoot that we did with a photographer in an older part of Shanghai. Our other pictures were taken inside a studio and I wanted to have pictures that better represented Shanghai. Of course, Sydney had her own ideas about what she was going to do that day. She did everything but cooperate with the photographer. I wasn't planning to be in the pictures but it was the only way to keep her from wanting to leave. In the hour photo session, Sydney only smiled once and out of 75 pictures, the only ones worth having are ones that you see on this blog.

Earthquake

You may have heard that there was an earthquake in the Sichuan province. The earthquake registered at 7.5 on the rictor scale and the aftershocks were reported to have reached Beijing, Shanghai, Taipei and Bangkok. We didn't even feel it where we are at so we are fine. The Chinese government has acted very swiftly to get help to the areas that need it so hopefully the damage and injuries will be kept at a minimal.

Happy Mother's Day

Sydney has been getting up between 4:30am - 5am this past week. I'm not sure why -- maybe she's off her schedule from our trip to Bangkok last week, she's teething or getting even with me for something. But today, she stayed in bed until 6am --- a much appreciated Mother's Day gift. We have also been having very trying mornings lately. But today, she woke up in a very good mood.

After a quick trip to the grocery store, we spent the morning playing outside. It has been raining pretty heavily the last couple of days but today was a beautiful, sunny day in the low 70s.

Sydney has been such a sweet, sweet girl this past week. She's been telling me "Mamma makes Sydney happy" and kissing me. The first time it happened, I almost cried. And almost bought her a puppy. That's the great thing about being a parent --- one minute I'm praying that I have the restraint to not spank her and the next minute I'm trying to figure out how I can manage a toddler and a puppy.

One minute I'm frustrated and the next minute I'm laughing out loud. She knows the words "happy," "sad," and "upset, " and she expresses how she feels with those three words. But when she tells me that she's upset, it's already pretty obvious to me ... and all of our neighbors. Like when she tells me "I crying" while she's crying.

I hope that all you mothers out there are getting a nice break and enjoying yourselves today.

Random Thoughts and Pictures

My friend Jennifer and I took a cooking class recently at the Passionate Chef. I can't believe that I've been in China 11 months without learning how to make Chinese dishes. We were the only people signed up for class that day so the instructor, Lotus, put together a menu based on our preferences. Lotus is Shanghainese and had studied cooking in Europe and Thailand before returning to Shanghai and starting her cooking classes. I am looking forward to having you all over for a Chinese dinner when we get back to Dallas.

Our ayi bought Sydney some toys the other day. Some were not age appropriate, like candles, but it was very sweet of her to think of Sydney. She keeps asking me if I was planning to ship big items to the US too and I'm a bit nervous that more and bigger presents are forthcoming. I've graciously thanked her for the presents and explained that we don't have room to pack anymore things, which is very true. The ayi and I were talking about Sydney and I moving back to the US in 3 weeks and our ayi started crying, which got Sydney crying, which made the ayi cry even more. I know that our ayi will miss Sydney dearly and I really feel for her. But much less so after she let Sydney write all over a wall with a red pen and it won't wash off. She let Sydney write all over her pants today with markers and it didn't wash off and the pants had to be thrown away.

Sydney has been feeling a bit off lately. I've talked to her about our impending move but she didn't understand any of it. But she does sense that there is something going on as she sees the growing pile of things and boxes all over the house. I've been really stressed and distracted lately and I'm sure it registered with her. She's been a bit more emotional and needing more attention, hugs and cuddle time lately. Her teacher has also noted a change in her behavior. I've been enjoying the extra hugs and cuddle time --- it reminds me of what really matters and what is background noise.

I've been a bit worried about how Sydney will react to the big move. She was only 12 months old when we moved here and she really wasn't old enough to be attached to a place or people. But now that she is almost 2, she is much more aware and she has made several friends at school. Just in the last couple of months she has started to bond with her classmates. She talks about them when I ask her about her day at school and incorporates them in our stories. And she adores her teachers. I'm really sad for her to have to leave them all behind and start over. I'm going to a home that I have known for 7 years and to friends that I've known for years. She is going to a house that she probably doesn't remember and to people that she hardly knows. I keep having to remind myself that kids are resilient and that she will bond with her new teachers and other kids in Dallas.

I have spent the last 11 months looking for an Asian doll for Sydney -- not just in Shanghai, but also in Beijing, Hong Kong, Saigon, Siam Reap and Bangkok. Sydney has an Asian doll that she has had since she was 6 months and it is more of a baby doll. I have been looking for more of a toddler doll, and the only Asian doll that I have found was in Bangkok last week but she was dressed like a girl who is REALLY popular with the boys. Surprisingly and disappointingly, a vast majority of the dolls that I have found were either Barbies or caucasian dolls. I guess I'll have to buy an Asian doll after I leave Asia.

Last Day in Bangkok

We spent the morning at the swimming pool at the hotel and then headed to Central Chidlom for lunch. I've read very good things about the food court there, called the Food Loft, and it didn't disappoint. There were food of all nationalities and a desert section with items like fried cheese cake and fried ice cream. The food was good, cheap and the service is fast. We were going to go out to dinner tonight to celebrate our last day in Bangkok but I can't muster up the energy and patience to deal with the traffic and the heat. So once again, we ordered in.

Sydney started calling me "Mom" yesterday instead of "Momma" or "Mommy," and I don't like it. I tried to get her to call me Mommy again but I was only partially successful. Sydney started calling Mommy in March and in a blink of an eye, we've arrived at Mom. How did we go from a little baby calling me Momma to a toddler calling me Mommy to a kid calling me Mom??? Sydney has started greeting me with "Hi ya Mom. How are you?" recently, and it always puts a smile on my face.

I've started talking to Sydney in Vietnamese in the last couple of months. There was no way that I was going to return to Dallas and face my parents when Sydney can speak Chinese and not Vietnamese. I already got an earful about her lack of language skills when we met my parents in Saigon. She's picking it up fast, although she sounds like an American speaking Vietnamese. I'm sure that it is because I speak Vietnamese like an American.

Restful Day

Sydney slept in this morning and insisted that we spend the morning in our room playing with her new toys and watching her new Elmo DVD. I was happy to accommodate because I didn't sleep well last night.

I'm feeling a bit of anxiety about the big move back. There is so much to do. I almost cancelled this trip to Bangkok but it is our last trip in Asia for a while and I didn't want to miss the opportunity when it would be an easy flight. And I'm glad that we came -- I really love Bangkok. Whenever things feel overwhelming, I make lists and getting organized always makes the mountain seem like a molehill. My tenants, who had previously indicated that they couldn't move out until June 7th, notified me yesterday that they will move out on May 31st so I'll be able to move into my house on June 1st. YEA!!! I'm taking the week of June 2nd off so it will give me a much needed week to get settled. So while Sydney spent the afternoon running around the hotel room, I made lists and was able to breathe a little easier.

We left the hotel to go to lunch at Shin Daikuko, a Japanese restaurant. It was a disappointing lunch -- the sushi was uninspiring and the shrimp tempura tasted bland. This was the first meal that I've ever seen Sydney turn away from. We went to the Emporium mall after lunch and Sydney snacked at the food court. We went to the mall mostly so that Sydney could run around in an air conditioned place. But of course, she fell asleep shortly after we arrived at the mall so I had nothing to do but shop. And shop I did. Then we picked up some lemon herbed chicken and fries for dinner at the hotel tonight.

For those who are planning a trip to Bangkok, here are a couple of survival tips. There are a lot of mosquitos here. Even though I doused Sydney in mosquito repellent, she still got bit twice. Not all taxis go to all locations. I can't tell whether they are restricted to certain zones or they just didn't like the way we looked. Most of the taxi drivers know a little English, although you will need to provide the driver with the name and address of where you want to go in Thai. The malls here are really amazing. Each floor is dedicated to a target shopper -- a floor of all things for men, one for women, one for kids, etc. It's very convenient. And all malls have taxi lines.

Thai people are one of the nicest, friendliest people that I've been around. They are so pleasant, which is no small feat in this heat and traffic congestion. Sydney is getting a lot of attention here and she is hamming it up for her audience. One of our taxi drivers today was 1/2 Vietnamese and 1/2 Chinese. When he learned that we were Vietnamese, he called his Vietnamese mom on his mobile phone to talk to me. She seems like a very nice woman from our short conversation.

More Bangkok Fun

We went to the Wat Phra Kaeo this morning. This temple is also known as the Temple of the Holy Jewel Image or the Temple of the Emerald Buddha. It is located next to the Grand Palace so we were able to walk around the grounds of the palace but we were not allowed to enter the palace.

We arrived at the Palace an hour after it opened and the grounds were already packed with tour people. Sydney had to stay in the stroller the entire time except for when we rested in the shade to get out of the sweltering heat. It was already 85 degrees at 9:30am -- a reminder of what it will be like when we move back at the end of the month. I've been to this temple before and I am still amazed at its opulence. Sydney didn't enjoy this temple as much as the others. She was mostly confused about the numerous colorful statutes. And because of the crowds, she wasn't able to run around and touch things. I thought that she was bored but she didn't want to leave. Sydney has been a such a trooper on this trip. Even with the heat and the crowds, Sydney never whined or insisted that we return to the hotel. I'm usually the one that needs to return to the hotel to rest.

After a short rest at the hotel, Sydney and I went to Le Dalat for a Vietnamese lunch. I had the pho soup, which was great, and Sydney had the marinated beef with noodles, which was also a hit. Sydney feel asleep in my arms while we were waiting for the food. I didn't bring our stroller because we were not planning to walk around. After watching me painfully try to eat the soup with one hand while trying not to spill any of it on Sydney, the waitress kindly offered to hold Sydney while I ate. Luckily she woke up as soon as I finished my soup and was able to eat her lunch.

After lunch we went to the Four Seasons to play a bit before having tea service. Because of the traffic, it wasn't worth our time to go all the way back to our hotel and then have to leave for the Four Seasons shortly thereafter. The Four Seasons has a great courtyard with fish and turtles and the manager of one of the restaurants gave Sydney 2 pieces of bread to feed to the fish. Sydney threw the first one in the water whole and was disappointed that nothing happened. But once the manager showed her how to tear off small pieces and throw them in the water, Sydney had a great time watching the fishes fight for the bread. This Four Seasons hotel was the first luxury hotel that I had ever stayed in, which started an expensive vice. Actually, I paid $139 a night to stay there 5 years ago --- it's quite a bit more now.

We returned to the hotel after tea service to relax. I was going to take Sydney to the swimming pool but I was too tired. Sydney has been off her schedule since we've been here. She gets up at 5am, takes about an hour nap instead of her usual 2 hours, and doesn't go to bed until about 9pm. I hope that this is a temporary schedule.